Match Of The Day

Oh happy days. Pleasant weather and a tall, touching 6 foot, attractive leggy blonde in the rec. When we arrived there was a football game in progress but it only took her a few minutes to stop it dead by continually bending over to adjust her shoes. She was a minx alright. She even offered to prove to the more vocal of the players that she was indeed a real blonde but the dare proved too much for them and they chickened out on the proposal. On leaving the rec she, with a smile and a wave, enticed the attention of a passing dustcart which then proceeded to follow us on the short walk back to my place with her walking provocatively and lapping up the jeers and whistles. The agent who had supplied her warned me that she could be a handful. He wasn’t joking.

ADULTS ONLY

Is No The New Yes

So I posted a casting call on a modelling web site and as usual I stipulated no large tattoos. Prey tell me why then did most of the models who applied have at least one large tattoo. Have I missed the memo from the style elite informing me that the street dictionary meaning of the word no had reversed much like wicked and bad.

ADULTS ONLY

One Foot In The Grave

Do you remember back in your 40’s when you received your first pair of slippers as a Christmas present and you swore you would at the very least kill the giver? How times change. In my 60’s I don’t feel embarrassed to tell you that I have a choice of 3 different pairs to wear around the house. I’ve even done shoots in them. Bet the models thought I was a real cool geezer.

ADULTS ONLY

Autumn Leaves

One of my final shoots of last year. With the mildish autumn weather, which is more than can be said about this spring, we were able to get outside for a while. The lighting though was a typical British mishmash of one minute sun out next minute sun in so I’ve had to do a bit of meddling in Photoshop to try to get the colours looking consistent across the set.

ADULTS ONLY

Papa’s Got A Brand New Bag

James Brown. 1965.

Well not exactly. Over the years I have bought many camera bags of different shapes and sizes to suit whatever equipment I was carting around at that time. I suppose my favourite bag is one of the original Billingham’s, purchased many moons ago, but although the exterior is still in excellent condition the interior partitions have fallen apart. I didn’t like my Nikon D810 rattling around inside it, and I had no intention of buying yet another bag, so after a bit of research I’ve got myself one of those cheapish camera bag inserts. I couldn’t find one on eBay that fitted so ended up having to pay more on Amazon but it does the job okay and the camera now looks more secure.

ADULTS ONLY